What is the normal body count for a 17 year old? Some of my friends have a few and I do not have any.

Honestly, there’s no such thing as a “normal” body count for a 17-year-old. Everyone’s timeline and comfort level are completely different, and that’s totally okay. Just because your friends have more experience doesn’t mean you’re behind or missing out - it just means you’re on your own path.

It’s also really important to remember that not everyone is having sex at 17. Even though it might seem like everyone around you is, that’s actually not true. According to the Sexual and Reproductive Health of New Zealand Secondary School Students: A Youth19 report, only about 17.9% of 17-year-old females said they’d ever had sex. So the majority haven’t - it just isn’t something people always talk about openly, which can make it feel way more common than it really is.

What really matters is that you wait until you feel ready - not pressured, not comparing yourself - but genuinely ready in your own time. It’s such a personal thing, and its way more meaningful to focus on whether relationships are safe, respectful, and genuinely wanted, rather than counting numbers or comparing yourself to others.

Also, can we talk about the word “body count” for a second? It’s kinda wild when you think about it - that phrase actually came from counting how many people were killed in battles. So when people use it to talk about sex, it can make something really personal sound like a score or competition. But it's not - you don’t owe anyone your body, and your worth isn’t defined by numbers. What actually matters is how you feel, that you’re respected, and that your choices are truly yours.

Take care of yourself and your boundaries. You’re not “behind” for waiting - there’s nothing wrong with taking your time - and you’ll never regret waiting for the right moment that feels good, comfortable, and safe for you💛

Arohanui,

Māmā Ruru